Every single day, we hear insults. Often, they’re being said behind our backs. And when they are said to our faces, they’re usually in the form of a backhanded compliment.
Think about the latter for a moment. You think you’re being complimented. You may even smile and nod at the person who said it. Then, as their words bounce around in your brain for a few moments, you feel as though you’ve just been backhanded by them. What they said wasn’t a compliment at all. How dare they say such a thing.
I love what you’ve done with your hair. How did you get it to come out of your nostrils like that?
My favorite is this one: That’s a beautiful photo of you. I didn’t recognize you at first.
They might be saying I’m beautiful, but only in that photo. Apparently, I’m not beautiful on a regular basis. Perhaps I should work on that.
Or perhaps, I should wait around while they add more insult to injury.
There are plenty of other insults out there. And many are just lingering on the tip of someone’s tongue.
The Best Insults are True
Insulting someone isn’t hard. All you have to do is tell the truth. And perhaps that’s why they sting so much. Al Bundy may be the reigning champion for insults. He just opened his mouth, and the zingers would pour out.
Though, to be fair, if I had to be a shoe salesman, I’d likely be insulting people left and right, too. And don’t even get me started on being married to someone like Peg.
Don’t be ashamed of who you are, that is your parent’s job.
You are the reason we have warning labels on everything. This is an impressive insult that also happens to be true. Basically, someone lacks all common sense. And, as a result, warning labels have to be placed on the most random things.
Have you shopped at a store and wondered why there are so many warning labels? Cardboard boxes of dinner mixes in the grocery div say “Chicken not included.” Oh. My. God. That means that someone likely bought this one time and called the company to complain. You know, because the weight and the fact that it wasn’t in the refrigerated div didn’t give it away.
And so, insulting people can actually be a way of telling them the truth. It hurts to do it sometimes, but it may end up helping them to get a clue. At least, that’s always the hope, isn’t it?
I Am Returning Your Nose…
Yes, you read that headline correctly. I am returning your nose because I found it in my business.
There are always those busybodies who find it nearly impossible not to find out everything you’re doing and why. And it might be necessary to point it out to them in the process.
Since they are the ones being rude, an insult isn’t really out of line. And you don’t need to say everything to them. Just say that you’re returning their nose. If they don’t get it, you can hand them the result of the insult.
I don’t have the patience or the crayons to explain this to you.
If someone lets out an audible gasp, that’s their way of telling you that they are shocked that you had the audacity to speak to them in that way. That’s the trouble with busybodies. Many of them assume that it’s their right to know about your business.
Of course, you can let out the same audible gasp to remind them that you are shocked that they’d try to pry into your personal business.
We hear those gasps anytime someone sees our billboards on the side of the road in Sherman Country. Quality Erections. It’s not as though we’re advertising our personal business. We just happen to be responsible for quality erections since 1976. And that’s something to be incredibly proud of, so we boast about it whenever (and wherever we can).
We’re talking about pole barns, so don’t get too worked up. You can certainly throw an insult our way, but we’re pretty sure that you’re not going to hurt our feelings. If we said anything to offend you, it was purely intentional.
I Like the Way You Try
Oh, so you want to add insult to injury while reading this? Well, I like the way you try to make us feel bad about our quality erections. The reality is that we work hard to maintain a strong reputation for our steel buildings.
Somehow, the word “try” has become an insult. Have you noticed that?
You bake something that doesn’t look so good, and people comment about how “at least you tried.” Don’t judge a book by its cover. The cupcakes still taste amazing, Karen.
You landscape around your pole barn and people say you “tried to do your best.” I did do my best, and the landscaping looks fantastic, Chad.
Ultimately, you have to be able to know when someone is insulting you. Then, decide if it’s true and if you’re willing to live with what they say.
We usually take this approach: I’m rubber, you’re glue. Whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you.
Your House Feels So Cozy and Lived In
Warning: the above is an example of a backhanded compliment. At least that’s what most people intend it to be when they say it.
I don’t know about you, but I like a cozy house that looks like it’s lived in. If it’s a little sloppy from time to time, that’s my business, not yours. Who wants to live in a house that looks like it’s a model home? Certainly not me.
Cozy and lived-in is something you should aspire toward, and a pole barn can provide all sorts of incredible possibilities.
If you have some land in Minnesota or Kansas, Sherman Pole Buildings can help you to create an incredible, custom pole barn as your residential home. We can also create a storage facility, a garage, an ag building, or any other kind of structure you may need.
If you need tips to achieve cozy and lived-in, we’re here to help with that, too.